i need someone to help ME!!!!!!

so..... ;'( i really need a friend i can just talk to someone i can sall up anytime of the day and talk to someone i know will be there for me whenever i need them.... i dont have that i have so many people who come to me and i listen to everyones problems i try to helo with everyones stuff id do anything for anyone i try everything i can to be there for whoever needs me... why cant i have someone like that everytime i start to open up to someone whose opened up to me and ive helped out they seem to turn away from me they find new friends they forgot about me like im just some person they use to make themselves feel better idk what i should do should i go and just stop helping people.... i cant do that im not that kinda person i cant leave someone when they need help..... maybe thats whats wrong with me i care to much about people who care so little about me maybe its just me maybe they just see me as someone who they can talk to but they know i dont spread crap yet they dont care enough about me to actually help me in my time of need :'( why.... why cant i have someone like that i turn to God for everythhin i talk to Him about everything why cant i find someone here to that i can talk to and they can talk back to me i feel so alone whenever i need that someone to talk to whenever i need to just vent but i dont have that..... they say its wrong to keep things bottled up but i aint blew up....to bad....yet :'( idk what to do i hate this feeling of  lonelyness :'( sorry for these past few depressing blogs but its all i been feeling.....

thinking to much

bored in spanish i was so intent on learning it now i got to much junk on my mind to even pay attention i do the work and get a good grade but i dont pay attention in like anyclass anymore and i mean the only reason why im passing so good is cause i can figure out ways to get it done and in spanish its easy i can just look it up history its cause i watch the history channel all the time and it just hits me if i think about it long enough english i sit by smart people and its just easy math there is NO HOPE but we just had a fire dril it was great they shut all the doors so we couldnt get out it was great now were back in here and its going off again thats great so i guess im leaving again but i kinda just wanna stay here idc if its real or fake anymore!!!!! i just been thinking way too much and nothings going the way i want to ive been invited to smoke weed and i actually said i prolly will ive never in my life thought id ever do anything but dip and smoke a few cigs i mean i know thats not good either thats why i dont do it that much anymore unless i got alot on my mind..... why is this that ive actually thought about it and might actually do it today or friday just idk dude :/// i hate this i hate this feeling like im nothing i hate the fact that i think its true i hate feeling defeated i hate feeling down and lower then dirt and the feeling of nothingness and just like my life is just failin lately :'(

HAHAHAHAHAHH

well i just took my spanish exam and im a boss and just aced that joker :DD and to add to my happiness a girl in the class that for some reason hates me and is a total JERK FACE just got all her answers erased and has to re take it HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH
sucks to be her lol but anyway im doing my first thing for pnn today and i am dressed up and am doing sports i hope i do good it should be really fun and maybe ill get to do it more often so i had a pretty good weekened statring with friday i went to the game with the pnn teacher and got to shoot the game and the interviews which i woulda got to do if we won but they suck without me so we lost :( but :))) lol i went to my friends 17th birthday saturday night and got to watch all the games i wanted to as alabama won sadly but good game georgia finally beat someone Lsu stayed strong and won again and my boys AUBURN TIGERS!!!!!!!!! rebounded but play like JUNK!!!!!!!!!!! but still WAR EAGLE SON!!!!!!!!! now i personally think its hilarious that she has to re take it but its what she deserves for being a jerk all the dang time whenever i aint never did junk to her but laugh b ut then again i laugh at EVERYONE and EVERYTHING i guess you either love me or hate me no in between but i could care less im who i am around everyone im around idc what anyone thinks.....anymore i realized its to stupid to just carry on caring about what people think cause it'd be fake and pointless casue no one would know the real me heck idk if i knew the real me for awhile there but anyway WAR EAGLE!!!! and AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH bye now :))))))))))

God rocks my world

so how about i just got done with my notecards in second block for my AP HISTORY class in THIRD BLOCK :)) hahha imma genius i was gonna do it last night but had SOOOOO much on my mind it was unreal i went to this thing at Columbus State University with a local singer song writer garrett lee he is an amazing man of God and so much fun to talk to well after we left there i went to the band practice for my church which he also leads and found out that one of our band members recently married is about to have his first kid in about 9 months hahahah but his name is randy and i started to talk to him afterward its so awesome to know that not everyman is like my dad to know that there are men out there that go so hard for God i thank God do much for putting these men in my life that i know i can talk to about anything and that its so cool how i can text them if i am going through something and they will be there in an instant and i love the fact that these men are so young yes i know randys past and what he's struggled with and its awesome how that im struggling with the same things and i know he will be ther to help me God is AMAZING!!!!!!! idk what i'd do without these people i hope one day to be a man like them and have someone look up to me and i know ill be able to be there to help them with anything :) GOD IS AMAZING!!!!!! o and plus thats not even half the convo lol

Sarah Elizabeth Tindell

she is a blogging WHORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♥♥
but i love her :))) if it wasnt for her i wouldnt've even started this blogging thing lol

another random blog in spanish

well this is my fisrt actual blog sitting here in spanish class listening to music casue im LEGIT and spanish is so easy :)) they say its cause im half mexican but you know whatever lol
i think this is pretty cool yet really weird i dont think big guys like me usually blog but you know its whatever idc i think its fun i love to write and its a better way then some people get rid of their fustrations and plus my friend sarah sitting here and her total weirdness is sayin i should try it so i say what the heck
but i am listening to my favorite band or one of them anyway Tenth Avenue North they are amazing
really glad my spanish teacher cant see me so i can do all this :D
so anyway im so mad that i cant play football or wrestle this year :'(
i cracked my T-10 vertebrate and now i cant do anything until next year thankfully imma junior not a senior :)
but im just randomly saying junk so imma get off for now :))))

my first blog/ I Am poem

I Am

I am hungry for Christ and wanting more of him

I wonder why this life is so hard

I hear the cries of the children as they hurt

I see the pain in the eyes of millions

I want peace for the hurting

I am hungry for Christ and wanting more of him

I pretend everything is alright

I feel like Christ has put a burden on me for the ones who are hurting

I touch my eyes as I hold back the tears

I worry the world will never know of the true love Christ has for them

I cry when I don’t know how I can help the ones who need it

I am hungry for Christ and wanting more of him

I understand what I am standing up for when I praise the name Jesus

I say I will always love Jesus Christ

I dream the world would radically change for Christ

I try to help those who need me no matter what the cost

I hope I will stay strong in what I believe in for my whole life

I am hungry for Christ and wanting more of him