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well last night was terrible i planned on being asleep at ten but my sister wwent crazy doing her normal thing yelling and screaming hollering fussing its scary cause if she dont stop she coould be taken away casue idk how much more my family can take and it scares me and idk what else i can do i constantly pray about it and think about it all the time i dont want her to go away regardless she's my sister i love her but just idk anything anymore :( i  got up this morning and ran in a sauna suit and sweats which is ALOTA sweating but noe im STARVING and aint ate all day so fields of faith tonight should be great :)

courageous

why is all we look for are worldly things like cars houses clothes whatever??? why is that why do we focus on the things that literally mean NOTHING!!!!! you cant take your car with you when you die all that money you cant use it once your dead that big nice house guess what once you die its useless!!!! why dont we focus on eternal things like our relationship with Jesus Christ why dont we focus on getting right with God before anything God says we are to be fishers of men which means we are to go out into this world and do everything we can to bring people to him to give him everything we have to go out and show people who He is!!!! we were made to be COURAGEOUS!!!!!!! why dont we live that life why do we live the life of a coward who is to afraid of what others think to stand up and stand out for God??!?!?!?! i for one and done with it im done with being a coward im done with being afraid of what people think because i stand up for God im done with standing back and falling back into the drill of things that everyone else does im done with it im through i am meant to be courageous I WILL LIVE COURAEOUS FOR MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WILL give Him my ALL,,, ALL the time not just part of the time not just at church not just with certain people no with EVERYONE around EVERYONE no more mask no more excuses romans 1:16 till i die I WILL love unashamed for my God!!!!!!

banana pancakes

i really want some banana pancakes while im sittin here listening to this song by jack johnson lol sucks being sick on a diet and wanting food and friends here right now but you know i got Jesus and i got my music and i got the few friends i do have thats all that matters i love all 3 of the things that i just listed <3 all in all ive got a pretty good life better then most thats a definate i got a mom who loves me friends who are always there for me a God who is LEGIT!!!!!! so much stuff that i have that others would kill for and all i seem to want is more whats wrong with me i know how the other half lives up and down ive seen it both its not pretty so i got blessed i got really blessed and i will do EVERYTHING i can to always be sure that i dont complain about stuff just idk this is insanely random thoughts that i literally just thought of while i was typing prolly why my blog is called random blogs lol im a very odd person

lucy!!!!! :)

so i got this friends named lucy and she is a total dork shes such a nerd ;) and my  stalker and if she reads this she better not be mad cause then id laugh and be sad very confusing :)))) but shes like BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!! AS HELL!!!!!!!

i give up

i hate trying i hate feeling like i fail i hate the fact that i try and try and still fail i try and try and guess what i fail i dont see a reason to keep going on and on with this crap i feel terrible with my life i seem to fail at everything i do i fail God i fail my mom i fail my friends i fail my life i fail with everything i dont seem to help anyone all i seem to do is annoy people thats what everyone keeps saying no one likes me everyone hates me people dont wanna talk to me people dont care about me im fat im ugly im worthless i dont see the point in anything anymore maybe its true maybe what these people say are true maybe the way i feel lately isnt bad maybe its the way a failure should feel i seem to not have friends lately i seem to not have anything nothing just like a vapor in the wind i feel the only way i stand out from the crowd is cause im fat ugly and tall nothing more i feel less then dirt lately i feel like bug crap i cant find that im good at anything i cant find anything im good at maybe i aint good at nothin but  failin and i seem to do alota that lately alot of that :'( just FML!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i just give up with my   trying with the grades how i try to make friends everything

fml

well i kinda had a good day all in all was better then nothing not to great but not to bad you know those in between days realized alota stuff realized i love my best friend but itll never happen realized ill never get anywhere but the friend zone and it pisses me off cause it dont matter what i do i still get stuck being just friends nothing more UGH FML!!!!!

i need someone to help ME!!!!!!

so..... ;'( i really need a friend i can just talk to someone i can sall up anytime of the day and talk to someone i know will be there for me whenever i need them.... i dont have that i have so many people who come to me and i listen to everyones problems i try to helo with everyones stuff id do anything for anyone i try everything i can to be there for whoever needs me... why cant i have someone like that everytime i start to open up to someone whose opened up to me and ive helped out they seem to turn away from me they find new friends they forgot about me like im just some person they use to make themselves feel better idk what i should do should i go and just stop helping people.... i cant do that im not that kinda person i cant leave someone when they need help..... maybe thats whats wrong with me i care to much about people who care so little about me maybe its just me maybe they just see me as someone who they can talk to but they know i dont spread crap yet they dont care enough about me to actually help me in my time of need :'( why.... why cant i have someone like that i turn to God for everythhin i talk to Him about everything why cant i find someone here to that i can talk to and they can talk back to me i feel so alone whenever i need that someone to talk to whenever i need to just vent but i dont have that..... they say its wrong to keep things bottled up but i aint blew up....to bad....yet :'( idk what to do i hate this feeling of  lonelyness :'( sorry for these past few depressing blogs but its all i been feeling.....

thinking to much

bored in spanish i was so intent on learning it now i got to much junk on my mind to even pay attention i do the work and get a good grade but i dont pay attention in like anyclass anymore and i mean the only reason why im passing so good is cause i can figure out ways to get it done and in spanish its easy i can just look it up history its cause i watch the history channel all the time and it just hits me if i think about it long enough english i sit by smart people and its just easy math there is NO HOPE but we just had a fire dril it was great they shut all the doors so we couldnt get out it was great now were back in here and its going off again thats great so i guess im leaving again but i kinda just wanna stay here idc if its real or fake anymore!!!!! i just been thinking way too much and nothings going the way i want to ive been invited to smoke weed and i actually said i prolly will ive never in my life thought id ever do anything but dip and smoke a few cigs i mean i know thats not good either thats why i dont do it that much anymore unless i got alot on my mind..... why is this that ive actually thought about it and might actually do it today or friday just idk dude :/// i hate this i hate this feeling like im nothing i hate the fact that i think its true i hate feeling defeated i hate feeling down and lower then dirt and the feeling of nothingness and just like my life is just failin lately :'(

HAHAHAHAHAHH

well i just took my spanish exam and im a boss and just aced that joker :DD and to add to my happiness a girl in the class that for some reason hates me and is a total JERK FACE just got all her answers erased and has to re take it HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH
sucks to be her lol but anyway im doing my first thing for pnn today and i am dressed up and am doing sports i hope i do good it should be really fun and maybe ill get to do it more often so i had a pretty good weekened statring with friday i went to the game with the pnn teacher and got to shoot the game and the interviews which i woulda got to do if we won but they suck without me so we lost :( but :))) lol i went to my friends 17th birthday saturday night and got to watch all the games i wanted to as alabama won sadly but good game georgia finally beat someone Lsu stayed strong and won again and my boys AUBURN TIGERS!!!!!!!!! rebounded but play like JUNK!!!!!!!!!!! but still WAR EAGLE SON!!!!!!!!! now i personally think its hilarious that she has to re take it but its what she deserves for being a jerk all the dang time whenever i aint never did junk to her but laugh b ut then again i laugh at EVERYONE and EVERYTHING i guess you either love me or hate me no in between but i could care less im who i am around everyone im around idc what anyone thinks.....anymore i realized its to stupid to just carry on caring about what people think cause it'd be fake and pointless casue no one would know the real me heck idk if i knew the real me for awhile there but anyway WAR EAGLE!!!! and AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH bye now :))))))))))

God rocks my world

so how about i just got done with my notecards in second block for my AP HISTORY class in THIRD BLOCK :)) hahha imma genius i was gonna do it last night but had SOOOOO much on my mind it was unreal i went to this thing at Columbus State University with a local singer song writer garrett lee he is an amazing man of God and so much fun to talk to well after we left there i went to the band practice for my church which he also leads and found out that one of our band members recently married is about to have his first kid in about 9 months hahahah but his name is randy and i started to talk to him afterward its so awesome to know that not everyman is like my dad to know that there are men out there that go so hard for God i thank God do much for putting these men in my life that i know i can talk to about anything and that its so cool how i can text them if i am going through something and they will be there in an instant and i love the fact that these men are so young yes i know randys past and what he's struggled with and its awesome how that im struggling with the same things and i know he will be ther to help me God is AMAZING!!!!!!! idk what i'd do without these people i hope one day to be a man like them and have someone look up to me and i know ill be able to be there to help them with anything :) GOD IS AMAZING!!!!!! o and plus thats not even half the convo lol

Sarah Elizabeth Tindell

she is a blogging WHORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♥♥
but i love her :))) if it wasnt for her i wouldnt've even started this blogging thing lol

another random blog in spanish

well this is my fisrt actual blog sitting here in spanish class listening to music casue im LEGIT and spanish is so easy :)) they say its cause im half mexican but you know whatever lol
i think this is pretty cool yet really weird i dont think big guys like me usually blog but you know its whatever idc i think its fun i love to write and its a better way then some people get rid of their fustrations and plus my friend sarah sitting here and her total weirdness is sayin i should try it so i say what the heck
but i am listening to my favorite band or one of them anyway Tenth Avenue North they are amazing
really glad my spanish teacher cant see me so i can do all this :D
so anyway im so mad that i cant play football or wrestle this year :'(
i cracked my T-10 vertebrate and now i cant do anything until next year thankfully imma junior not a senior :)
but im just randomly saying junk so imma get off for now :))))

my first blog/ I Am poem

I Am

I am hungry for Christ and wanting more of him

I wonder why this life is so hard

I hear the cries of the children as they hurt

I see the pain in the eyes of millions

I want peace for the hurting

I am hungry for Christ and wanting more of him

I pretend everything is alright

I feel like Christ has put a burden on me for the ones who are hurting

I touch my eyes as I hold back the tears

I worry the world will never know of the true love Christ has for them

I cry when I don’t know how I can help the ones who need it

I am hungry for Christ and wanting more of him

I understand what I am standing up for when I praise the name Jesus

I say I will always love Jesus Christ

I dream the world would radically change for Christ

I try to help those who need me no matter what the cost

I hope I will stay strong in what I believe in for my whole life

I am hungry for Christ and wanting more of him